As a parent considering divorce, you will have heard, or soon be hearing a lot of mentions of the term, “the child’s best interests.” The court will keep this concept at the forefront of its mind when making decisions about things related to your child, such as custody and parenting plans.
However, the validity of the concept does not end with the signing of the final divorce papers. Rather, it is something you should bear in mind for future communication with your co-parent, too. Here are a few examples where it could be of great help:
Your ex wants to take your child away for their birthday
You get upset when your ex suggests they want to take your child to Disney for their birthday. It means you won’t get to see your child on their birthday for the first time ever. However, if you put yourself in your child’s shoes, you’d know they would love the opportunity to go to Disney and it would be a birthday they’d remember for years. They’d likely not have time to miss you, and besides, they know you will be there when you get back.
Your ex does something to upset you
You’ve got the children ready and are about to get them in the car and drive to the pre-arranged handover point. Your co-parent rings and says they can’t make it for another two hours as they’ve just got out of the meeting at work. Before you utter a cutting remark about how ironic it is that someone so incapable of communicating works for a communications company you remember the “child’s best interests.”
It won’t be in the children’s best interests to hear you belittle their other parent. Nor for them to see you arguing at the delayed handover. Nor for you to drive to your co-parents’ workplace and march the children in because you have “places you need to be.”
Co-parenting can be difficult for both parents and children. However, if you can keep the child’s best interests in mind throughout, they will thank you for it when they look back.