Divorce mediation has become exceedingly popular in the last couple of decades. This makes sense, as mediation is often more affordable than other types of divorce. It also is typically less stressful than having a lengthy and bitter courtroom battle.
While you can likely increase your chances of having a successful divorce mediation simply by choosing the right mediator, mediation does not work for every couple. Here are three signs your mediation is not on the right track.
1. You are not making any progress
According to Psychology Today, mediation is a mental exercise that requires some practice. Therefore, you should not give up on mediation immediately. Nevertheless, if you and your soon-to-be ex-spouse are going in circles and not making any real progress, it may be time to change tactics.
2. Your spouse is not playing fairly
A good mediator knows how to keep you and your spouse on task. While you might expect your spouse to rehash some old wounds or even to try to settle old scores, the mediator should make him or her play fairly. If the mediator loses control of the process, your faith in it may never recover.
3. The mediator has a bias
Divorce mediators should be neutral. If the mediator appears to prefer you or your spouse, it is unlikely the process will lead to fruitful results. To diminish your odds of ending up with a biased mediator, plan to interview a few when choosing one.
Just because your divorce mediation is not working out does not mean you should immediately give up on the process. Ultimately, your attorney can advise you on whether to be patient, change mediators or opt for a more traditional end to your marriage.