We often hear people say that “half of all marriages” end in divorce. It may surprise you to hear, but the divorce rate according to the Center for Disease Control is down. The divorce rate in New Jersey, according to the National Center for Family and Marriage Research which relies on data from the U.S. Census Bureau, New Jersey has the third lowest divorce rate in the country, with a divorce rate around 11% for the state. Only Maine (10% divorce rate) and Wisconsin (10.8%) had lower divorce rates. The rate of divorce for older Americans is, however, increasing. The divorce rate in the U.S., according to the Institute for Family Studies, was approximately 15% for people ages 65 and older. The number of “grey” divorces which, generally speaking, involves divorce for those 50 and older, is on the rise even though the national divorce rate overall is in decline. According to USA Today, the divorce rate for Americans over the age of 55 has doubled since 1990.
Research indicates that there are various reasons why “grey” divorces are on the rise. There are various explanations for why this is the case. One reason is that many states like New Jersey have created “no fault” divorce statutes. They do not have to prove that a spouse is at fault. Divorce is more socially acceptable than it was in the past and divorce no longer bears the social stigma it once had. Another explanation for the increase in “grey” divorce is that life expectancy has increased, and people may not want to remain in a marriage that is unhappy for longer than they have to. They want to enjoy their later years on their own, or they may want to find another partner. Many older people are empty nesters or are in a situation where their children are grown or close to grown and no longer need them like they used to. Many older couples have delayed divorcing to wait for their children to grow, feeling it will impact or harm their children less. Women are often the spouse who will initiate a later in life “grey” divorce. While women are often more financially at risk after a divorce, women are often less financially dependent on their husbands. Unlike their mothers and grandmothers who lived during times when women could not open a bank account or hold a credit card in their own names, and may have been less inclined to have a college education, that is not the case now. More women have had educations and/or work experience by the time they are in their fifties or older, and they are able to live more financially independent than women decades ago were able to live. They may desire to live more independently now that their families no longer need them and they may long for more independence and peace in their later years. Older couples may be inclined to initiate a divorce because as they age, they want to make independent estate planning decisions and decisions about their health and aging to address future needs.
Divorce for “silver splitters” as they are called, may have some distinguishable issues than divorces where the spouses are younger. It is important to think about housing, income, health and life after a divorce.
Those in their fifties and older may not have as many issues with custody and child support because their children are either grown or close to grown. Custody and parenting time are less the issue as it pertains to their children, than perhaps paying for college or graduate school is.
Many people who divorce at this stage may have acquired significant assets, which a court would need to identify, value (as in the case of a real estate or a business) and ascertain how to fairly and equitably divide those assets between the parties. This can include retirement assets, which are important to distribute equitably as these parties may be retired or preparing for retirement. A court may need to enter one or more Qualified Domestic Relations Orders, which are particular separate orders entered by a court to divide a defined contribution plan (like a 401k) or a defined benefit plan (like a pension) or other retirement account between divorcing spouses without the parties incurring taxes. Parties need to understand how benefits accumulated during the marriage can be divorced, and how divorce may affect eligibility for Social Security retirement benefits. Potential loss of health insurance by one or both spouses can impact decisions of older divorcing couples.
The parties may need assistance determining how to handle equitable distribution of a home or other real estate, and assets such as stock, bank accounts, personal property, vehicles or other assets. Such couples may also have debt that needs to be distributed between them.
A ”grey” divorce may also involve issues of support. A long term marriage where the spouses have disparate earning capacities may result in an open duration alimony obligation. Also involved in such decisions are issues of retirement and planning for retirement. A spouse seeking to retire early may have to consider whether this is feasible if there is a support obligation. Health issues of one or both parties may also come to the forefront very commonly in a “grey” divorce. If one spouse is retired but not yet eligible for Medicare, alternate health insurance coverage may need to be obtained. A financial planner may be needed to help one or both parties develop a budget post-divorce.
It is important to get advice from a divorce attorney as to your specific situation and unique circumstances. The firm of Cipriano Law Offices, P.C. have attorneys with decades experience in both litigation services and mediation services and are capable of helping you either negotiate a fair settlement or to litigate the matter before the family court. The firm offers free telephone consultations with their attorneys so that you can discuss how to take the next steps.